Astrologer Lisa Stardust received a cheese reading—a form of tyromancy—from Jennifer Billock, a self-styled kitchen witch and the world’s only known cheese clairvoyant. Billock interpreted patterns in Camembert Brie and Emmental Swiss cheeses through computer-assisted rhythm and melody mapping. She accurately reflected Stardust’s emotional transformation and relationship shifts, even highlighting a connection to someone whose name starts with “T.” With odds of such synchronicity being less than one in a million, the experience felt uncanny yet deeply resonant. This ancient art of cheese divination, dating back to the 2nd century AD, proved to be surprisingly insightful and utterly delightful.
